Gremlins loiter unseen and unbidden in my home. For once I’m not talking about my kids although they make me wonder sometimes!
I’m talking specifically about the Hider gremlins. Their only role in life is to get me to pull my hair out, stamp my feet and suppress expletives. They take delight in my misfortune and misery.
They can’t abide my happiness.
I’ve named them Hider gremlins but they also go by other names such as the forgetfulness fairy.
You know when you go upstairs to get something but then can’t recall why you went or you’re about to say something and get interrupted and then can’t recall what you wanted to say well that’s the forgetfulness fairy derailing your train of thought.
Whispering into your ear unimportant things…..
You may call me paranoid but I first noticed their presence after having children.
Dummies would go missing, teaspoons would disappear and turn up in unexpected places. Once I lost a whole week, I’m still not sure where it went.
As we added to our brood of children and they got older in age, the gremlins depth of thievery and naughtiness escalated.
No longer satisfied with mundane objects they progressed to batteries, remote controls and several debit cards.
The cards were undoubtedly their greatest success. They would wait until we had ransacked the entire house and then reluctantly gone to the bank to order more and then the cards would reappear and have to be destroyed.
They seem to prefer us housebound and thrifty. To that end they have purloined my wallet and our car keys.
They really are vindictive. There's no other word for it. They know I aim to be organised and they just can't stand the thought of it.
All of the above scenarios I could just about cope with but now they've started on our socks it's all out war.
I can go to the washing machine, pair and wash and dry both socks yet when I come to put them away one is always missing.
I believe this is also known as the el nino phenomenon.
I'm going to have to fight back because now they've started on the contents of the medicine cabinet.Sigh.
Please don't attempt to disillusion me of my gremlin notion by saying we're simply disorganised. For one thing I've seen the havoc they wreak in other people's lives and for another I don't think I could take it. Sob.
Perhaps we should start a support group? Please comment and let me know if these gremlins have invaded your home also.